Or in my case, 8:00 to 4:00.
Next week will mark the beginning of yet another new chapter in our lives...I am going back to work full-time. You're looking at the newest Senior Habilitation Coordinator for a nearby county ARC. After months of searching in this competitive job market, Mike has not been able to find another sales job. So, after a lot of discussion, we decided that I would go back to work full-time and Mike would be stay home with the kids.
Dum-de-dum-dum!
My feelings about going back to work are mixed.
First of all, I was pretty damned impressed that after a 6-year absence from the workplace, that I was able to beat out three other applicants for the job. Not bad for an old broad (did I mention that my new boss is a good 10 years younger than me...Yikes).
In all honesty, I'm also excited about the prospect of getting up in the morning and having somewhere interesting to go. Somewhere where there's grown ups to talk to all day.
I have to be perfectly honest, I have no doubt that me staying home full time for all these years has been the best choice for my kids. When I think back just 2 years ago when we had three different therapists coming to the house everyday to work with Justin, it was indeed our only choice. There's no way I could've worked full-time when he was going through that...it would have been a logistical (and emotional) nightmare.
Having said that, being a stay at home parent is tough! Anybody who tells you otherwise has never tried it.
When I was in the hospital after giving birth to Ryan, I remember lying in my bed in my groovy Percodan state of mind and thought how great it was going to be to be at home with my new baby. Growing up a latch-key kid myself, I dreamed of doing things with my kids that I wished I'd done more of with my mom. Things like arts and crafts projects, baking chocolate chip cookies, making snowmen on a brisk winter's day.
And we did do all those things. Except that after making your 845th craft project you realize that your sick of cleaning up glue and paint from every conceivable surface (don't even get me started on glitter...I've seriously considered starting a petition to outlaw it altogether). Baking cookies is fun until you've eaten so many batches that you can see every bite manifest themselves as cellulite dimples on your ass. As for fun in the snow, you start to realize that the 30 minutes it takes to bundle your wee ones in their winter paraphenalia is simply not worth the effort when they complain after being outside for 5 minutes, "I'm cold. I want to go inside".
There are also unexpected challenges to being a stay at home parent. The boredom and bouts of loneliness were feelings that I was not prepared for.
And yet, I am loath to leave this life behind.
Why?
Because I've not missed a single "first" my kids have had. First words, first steps, first smiles. I was there for every single one of them.
Because for every frustrating moment, there have also been silly hilarious moments of playing with my kids that have made me laugh every single day.
Because there really is nothing better than waking up with your kids on a snowy morning and hearing the radio announce a “snow day”.
Because of the countless tiny vignettes that play like snapshots in my head and have comprised the past 6 years of my life.
It’s like that old saying, “I want to go…I just don’t want to leave.”
And, the truth is, I really am ready to turn this all over to my very capable husband (ready or not, Honey).
But I know a part of me will miss it forever.
The Unlikely Village of Eden A Memoir
8 months ago
2 comments:
Wishing you all the best! My husband has stayed home with the girls since day one. He is very often calked on for advice when friends are considering taking the plunge. The advice he always gives is the same and I think it's worth passing on. He says that if you're going to do it - whether 'it' is staying home or heading out into the workforce, embrace it. The biggest problems he's seem with friends have come from folks who say 'well, I'm doing this 'for now' or 'until something comes along'. He has been served incredibly well by jumping in with both feet and truly relishing the experience.
My best advice? Remember that the grass is always greener on the other side. It can be pretty easy to romanticize whatever ur us that you're NOT doing.
That's good advice, Jess. We are indeed trying to look at this experiene, not as an ending, but as a new beginning. I will miss those snow days though.
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